Alex Tang
Articles
- General
- Theology
- Paul
- Karl Barth
- Spiritual Formation
- Christian Education
- Spiritual Direction
- Spirituality
- Worship
- Church
- Parenting
- Medical
- Bioethics
- Books Reviews
- Videos
- Audios
- PhD dissertation
Spiritual writing
- e-Reflections
- Devotions
- The Abba Ah Beng Chronicles
- Bible Lands
- Conversations with my granddaughter
- Conversations with my grandson
- Poems
- Prayers
Nurturing/ Teaching Courses
- Sermons
- Beginning Christian Life Studies
- The Apostles' Creed
- Child Health and Nutrition
- Biomedical Ethics
- Spiritual Direction
- Spiritual Formation
- Spiritual formation communities
- Retreats
Engaging Culture
- Bioethics
- Glocalisation
- Books and Reading
- A Writing Life
- Star Trek
- Science Fiction
- Comics
- Movies
- Gaming
- Photography
- The End is Near
My Notebook
My blogs
- Spiritual Formation on the Run
- Random Musings from a Doctor's Chair
- Random Sermons from a Doctor's Chair
- Random Writings from a Doctor's Chair
- Random Spirituality from a Doctor's Chair
Books Recommendation
---------------------
Medical Students /Paediatric notes
Pretensions
Hello little one,
What Grampa likes about you is that you are transparent
in all that you do. You show your true self and hollers loudly your needs.
There are no pretensions in you. When you like someone or something, you
smiles and squeals with delight. You show your dislikes by heart curdling
screams. You have not learnt to have pretensions. That is good.
You see, pretensions are what many big people develop as
they grow up from your age to theirs. For some reasons, some big people want
to hide their true nature from the world. Some of them are not happy with
who they are and wants to prevent the other people from knowing them. They
feel vulnerable or just are discontented. Others are taught that they will
be rewarded by their loved ones only if they pretend to be someone else-
some one else who behave exactly as their loved ones expected them to
behave. While some pretends for rewards, others pretend because of fear.
Some big people will punish, use shame, or withhold their love from children
if they do not behave the way it is expected. In other words, pretend to do
what is expected of you and everything to be okay. Over time, these little
ones pretend so hard and long in that role that they forget who they or what
their true natures are.
Unfortunately for big people, these pretensions after
many years become masks – a persona they show to others. That may be
completely different from who they really are. Grampa calls this the real
and false self. The real self is the who you started with at birth and the
false self is the one you developed as you grow up. The false self seeks to
gain approval, affirmation, comradeship and acceptance. However good it
looks on the outside, the real self may be hurting inside. It is not real.
It is not who you are.
So little one, be your true self all the time. This is
who you are. This is who God has created you to be. Draw upon the strength
and love of your parents and grandparents, of all those who loves you, and
mostly on God who loves in the most, to remain who you are without
pretensions.
Love Grampa
Dear God,
Please help this little one to live without pretensions, to derive her identity from You and become whom you want her to be.
Amen
Back to Conversations Index
